You’d think this kind of affection, this length, this depth, this breadth of affection would lead to something. That’s what movies and TV tell me anyway. He’s the Jim Halpert to my Pam Beesley. The Bleeker to my Juno (only there was no boning or pregnancy involved!).
I’ve always been in love with him and he’s always been in love with me, we just have to admit it to ourselves, right? Well, I’m admitting it. I’m making it Tumblr official. I don’t care how much it hurts, it’s too tiring to pretend I’m okay with holding it back. Even if he’d never love me in a million years. It’s just easier to be honest with myself. Healthier, right? I do feel like Pam.
Alas, this is no TV show and there’s no huge season finale to make a sudden relationship occur. I can tell you, if I were writing my life, it would go a lot like Jim and Pam (probably a lot faster than that, but I do have such a flair for the dramatic).
This affection is most probably only on my part. But it’s such a deep affection. It may sound melodramatic or cliche, but I can’t escape it.
I’m in love without ever having so much as one date. Unless you count eating lunch as friends, with friends. Hanging out. Holding on to every word of those heart pounding conversations. Those are “dates”, in the unconventional sense.
It doesn’t make any sense. Not a lick. But I’m in over my head.
Thus is the source of this lighter-than-air feeling. This madness. These seemingly random grins when a wave of unbridled joy washes over me.
What a great first tumblr post, right? Well, I was inspired. :)